HONESTY AND TRUTH WORK

THE TRUTH WORKS Honesty was not always the best policy for many of us as children. We got punished so often for things that we didn’t do that we lost faith in the value of telling the truth. Honesty wasn’t practiced, encouraged, or rewarded. The shrewd person was the one who could get by with the most and still look good. We’ve spent most of our lives being careful not to say the wrong thing. We never thought of this a lying until we our children began to confront us.

As we grow in our parenting, we are learning a new way of relating to others called honesty. This has been very difficult for us to cultivate. We believed we were responsible for everyone else’s feelings so we were very careful about what we said. We didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, especially our children, so we tip-toed around then, watching their eyes and changing our story as we spoke.

The more we learn about emotional honesty, the harder it is for us to go on living with emotional avoidance or dishonesty. We are learning to tell the truth in our relationships. We feel so much better when we don’t have to worry about which white lie we’ve told whom. When we tell our children our true thoughts and feelings, we’re amazed that they aren’t hurt by our new honesty. And we’ve stopped telling little white lies to protect them from disappointment. We’re learning that the truth works.